This blog

is really just the anatomy of a heartbreak with which I have unfairly burdened myself. It is really not for anyone else but me, and so it is anonymous. An anonymous unfolding of the anonymous heartbreak I deny every time I walk down the street, and I weep for every night before I can fall asleep. I am tired of waking up with puffy eyes and tired of scorning my own sorrow for it's unwillingness to let go of me, of scolding myself for my willful, head-long plunge into the most emotionally vulnerable situation I have ever experienced in my life. But I have sworn off calling, writing, notifying him and now I guess I know what it felt like when I did this to others. What the eff do you do? Really, what do you do? Well, I guess you start an effing blog, something I thought I'd never do, and you write about your "feelings," something that makes me cringe, and you get through it to the other side, the place I long for.